What’s the weirdest phone call you have ever received?

HELLO

Looks at phone, sees a number local to me, so I answered.

Do you reside at 1234 X X Lane?

Why do I sweat between my legs all the time, top off my legs, all way down?

Yes sir it is.

Long pause, OK. (Inaudible talking). Could you hang on for just a sec?

Is your number (xxx) xxx-xxxx??

How do you handle family members who ask for handouts?

ATTENTION SPIKES UP. What could he want with me? Did I do something wrong? Lord did I forget to pay something? Questions start flying through my head. What would the detention center sheriff want with me?

I'm sorry to bother you, my staff just told me our guy corrected his information and had a number off for his home phone. Have a good day. Hangs up.

Whew, not in trouble!! But someone named Sean with a similar number is apparently about to have a rather bad day.

What is the best way to get revenge on people who hurt you?

Do what? Officer, I'm sorry I have no kids of my own, and I don't know anybody by that name.

I hear a pause on the line, it goes quiet for a few seconds.

Hi this is Sargent Moss from the County detention center. Is this Sean?

Does believing in God and Satan cause schizophrenia?

No sir I sure don't, I live in the next city over.

{RING} {RING}

I was trying to reach out to you because we have a Mr X here, who claims you are his legal guardian. He needs you to come down and sign some forms.

Why am I always so tired and I don't eat enough?

After a few moments he returns.

Sure no problem officer.